Perfect day

Today I woke up to you at 1230pm!!!! You slept all night and then some! When I went to get you this morning I had a headache so I put you in my bed with me. You were so happy. You don't like to snuggle and hug or be held. You are so independent! I hope you're that way in your teens lol you watched Telletubbies and smiled at them and ate some breakfast in bed. You leaned over and went mmmmmmmm and put your mouth out for a kiss with a mouth full. You giggled after and it was so funny! You were ready for a nap but wouldn't go down so I held you and rocked you and you slept on my chest! Not only slept, cuddled your arms under your chest and buried your head under my chin. Every time you were snoring I got up off the rocker to try to put you in bed and you cried so hard! It's been so long since you wanted to be cuddled. It feels like years since the last time you fought a nap! I slept with you in the rocker just rubbing your beautiful hair until I fell asleep too. You are becoming a sweet toddler who wants to be held, shares with me, lays and watches toons snuggled to me. You were like this as a newborn and young baby of course, but for a while you weren't so cuddly and I thought you would never want me to hold you.
These posts have been so slim and its because I got a new phone and this blog is on the old phone. I want you to know I didn't forget to keep track of how amazing our journey is.
You're my whole world Vivienne Allyn. Today was just what I needed as a mom to know you love me. Its so hard not knowing when you can't tell me and mean it. You're my everything. I love you so much 💓

My beauty

End of Jan 2016

Oh my how time has just flown by. Your first birthday is in a little under 3 weeks and I find myself wondering how we made it this far and how this happened so quickly. You are more gorgeous than I ever dreamed and you love me so deeply with the same love I have for you. Its crazy because when you are little you have this timeline that you expect to follow... Go to college, establish a career, get married, have children.. For us it didn't happen in that order but you came into my life right when I needed you. I remember holding you and  rocking you to sleep while crying ... I didn't want you to grow up. Now, I see your ambition, determination, and strong personality.. You want to do everything on your own.. And while it makes me so happy, I feel like the time has gone by so quickly. You say hey there, yes, what's that, yeah, mama and you don't want my help. Its hard to accept my little girl doesn't need me but I am so very proud of you Vivienne. You make me smile, you give me a reason, you challenge me, you are my everything and I love you with all of my heart. 💓 love your mommy

2016

Its 2016! Your first new year and your last first holiday! We have had the best year ever. I became your mommy, and nothing in the world will ever top that! You say mama, Dada, baba, tata and yea!!!! You can stand on your own but aren't walking yet. You clap, love the itsy bitsy spider song and Bubble Guppies. You have 7 very sharp teeth and a head full of hair! Our first Thanksgiving and Christmas were so amazing too. On Christmas morning you ripped into one or two presents then were ready for a nap hahaha. I didn't give you one because you were supposed to sleep on the way to mama and Kneecee and Troys where you were spoiled rotten! You still tore into presents but just had a mean mug on your face all day. You eat everything I eat and you love music. Every morning you wake up with the biggest grin ever and I melt. There's nothing sweeter than your beautiful face. Last night I worked and came home just in time to wake you up at 11:55. You slept on my chest on the couch until I woke you during the countdown, we kissed, you laughed and smiled and then went right back to bed. If I ever have any doubt there is a God you always remind me of him and his great love for us both. You came in my life when I needed you so much and you keep me going every single day. You are so happy (unless you need a nap) and you make everyone around you so happy too! It is crazy to think at this time last year you were in my belly but I didn't know you yet. I love you Vivienne Allyn. Here's to 2016 and all of our amazing adventures to come 💓

9 month pootie booty

Were approaching your first holiday season and I am so excited for our traditions to begin! We just had thanksgiving and you ate everything! Even my piece of birthday cake 😂 I've done all of your Christmas shopping and every time something comes in the mail I just want to give it to you. I don't know how I'll wait! You are 18 pounds, 30 inches and have 5 teeth!!! You pull up and try to walk and I caught you standing on your own a while back. As soon as I saw you you sat down like... Omg how did I do that? How did I get up like this? You are so beautiful and gorgeous. Right now you are taking a nap. You sleep anywhere from 11-1pm to 3-4pm! And when its 8pm you are ready for bed again. You are your mamas girl 🙌 I love you to the moon! ❤😙

8 month beauty

You, my sweet baby, are a firecracker.  You are pulling up trying to walk, smiling at anyone who looks at you from ear to ear with your 2 toothed grin, crawling around and stealing the show everywhere you go! Everyone wants to see you, play with you and buy you things and they just adore you! You wake up with the most beautiful smile every morning and that's what keeps me going. You have a best friend Lincoln who you love to touch. You touch her hands, her face and grab her bow out of her hair hahahahahaha. You two are going to be Heartbreakers and I hope you remain bff thru life. You have been miracles to Aunt Stacie and I. You are so curious and are always watching everyones every move. You still love, love bath time which makes me so happy as an old retired swimmer. We go to Charleston monthly, sometimes more, and you get spoiled by your family. They always have bags of gifts for you and pass you around and hold you the entire time. You have no interest in this ole baby food and love sharing dinner with me. Recently you've been staying up way past your bedtime at 8 until around 12! When I try to rock you you sit up smiling at me and laughing like yea right ma, I'm not going down til you do! Hahahahha its funny because as I rock you you sit up straddling me and bounce around laughing like I'm a horsey! Usually that makes me laugh too and buys you another hour of pay time with me :) I love you so much Vivvie.  I thank God for sending me you, saving me and putting motivation and love back into my life. As far as I'm concerned, you hung the moon and the stars. You are that amazing to me. I hope were always best friends. ❤

7 months

My most favorite thing ever was rocking you to sleep every night. You used to want me, need me, to do this every night. From 2.5-6 months every night we would go into your room, I'd take a seat on the rocker and you would melt into me as you fell asleep. You'd rub my face and grunt as you drank your bottle. Your bed time routine was bath at 715, lotion massage at 740, PJs and rocked to sleep at 8. Some nights I remember rocking you, staring at the wall and being so sad. I'd study your face so that I never forgot these moments. Everyone always tells you that you'll never know the last time you rock your baby to sleep so to never take it for granted. Lord they weren't lying. There's a poem and it says there's a last time for everything and you may never know that you are experiencing ad well. I kissed you over and over again while you slept in my arms every night. I prayed over you and breathed you in. Now you're a big 7 month old. You go to bed and hold your own bottle as you drift off into dream land. Its so bittersweet. I miss our intimate and bonding moments so much but I couldn't be more proud of you Vivienne. I hope one day you understand and feel the love I have for you. There is nothing in the world I wouldn't do for you. I am so proud to be your mommy ❤